Choosing Joy: Discovering Wellness Through Daily Choices

Dr. Christopher S. Culver

Happy Day! I live in a cul-de-sac area near Lake Overholser, not too far from our house. We usually take the dogs down and walk around the lake at random. We were really consistent for a long time, but life happened, and we chose to let other things prioritize and run our lives.

Last week, during a podcast I was on, we discussed the power of choices. The podcast host gave an example: we can choose to have grilled chicken and vegetables or a donut for dinner. If you know me, I prefer the donut but probably should choose the grilled chicken. This conversation left me thinking about all the choices we make each day – some good and some bad. It also left me in a reflective state as I reexamined my own life.

This morning, I woke up and chose to go on a walk with the dogs and my partner. I chose to push myself to start interval running. I chose to find joy in the moments – which was hard for me because, if you know me, I am an athlete in my mind (imaginary for sure) and always a solid “I will start on Monday.” Anyone relate?

As we were walking back from the lake, I was thinking about the start of the week and resetting my mind. I started on this self-employment journey about three weeks ago, and it has been a fascinating journey. So, resetting and motivating myself looks very different than before. As I walked and thought about the new week and reflected on the last three weeks, I thought about a text message I received from a former colleague last week. She asked, “Chris, how do you handle burnout?” Interestingly, as I was participating in an X Chat on Sunday night, we discussed emotional health. What I came to realize is that burnout is real, and emotional health is real. However, we do not do enough to talk about the importance of it.

[Side note: If you are not participating in #teachpos X Chat on Sunday nights at 6:30 CDT and 7:30 EDT, you are missing out on some great conversations. Join Craig Shapiro (@Shapiro_WTHS) and others for a great time!]

How do we prioritize our own emotional health to prevent burnout? Great question.

I have worked in positions before where I have experienced burnout. I chose to allow myself to pour all my energy into the space without pouring into myself. It not only impacted my mental health but also my physical health and other outside factors. We cannot choose to allow ourselves to get to that point! So, what choices do we take to have a more proactive approach to this?

1. Create clear boundaries - Have those boundaries so that you can do things that fill your cup. Remember, a lot of things that we think are emergencies can really wait until tomorrow. We have to ask ourselves, “Does it really matter?”

2. Be present - Be in the moment.

3. Turn off notifications on social media - We are addicted to notifications, so by turning off notifications and sounds, we will not be tempted to leave the present.

4. Take your email off your cell phone - Part of setting boundaries, so only answer emails when you are on your device, specifically around the hours of 11 AM to 4 PM.

5. Do what you love - Whether you like to read, write, walk, run, bike, draw, doodle, graphic design, take hot baths, etc. – do what it is for you.

6. Understand that it is okay to say “no” - Part of setting boundaries; you have to say no to things if you do not have the capacity to do them and if they do not fill your cup.

7. Drink Water - Stay hydrated.

8. Affirmations - Affirm yourself and remember that you are not a negative story in your head. Think of all the wonderful things that you are.

9. Energy - Give energy to things that excite you. Don’t allow negative energy to invade your space.

So many of us are rooted in a heart of service that we want to help, heal, lead, and serve, which can run us ragged. We cannot even fathom the idea of taking care of ourselves.

We have to choose to prioritize ourselves.

Listen, I am not talking about days and days of time (unless you have that availability). I am talking about 5-10-30-45 minutes a day. Where you block this time out for you and you are intentional about doing things that make you happy and give you joy.

When we experience moments of joy and happiness, we are more likely to find moments of gratitude. Gratitude is not an attitude, but a way of life. Find the good in each moment. If you’re feeling adventurous, choose to spread some gratitude today. Text someone (or call, or email) that you have not talked to in a while. Let them know you appreciate them and why you are grateful for them. Not only will this spread kindness, but it also makes you feel good. Heck, you may be surprised, and get some gratitude back at you in the reply. If you do this, share with me! I would love to hear from you!

We have to choose to normalize talking and prioritizing our emotional and mental health — modeling the examples for others.

Thank you for doing what you do. Thank you for showing up as you. Thank you for being kind and a bright light. I am rooting for you. I am grateful for you.

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